The Film Chronicles

The Muppets

The Muppets, 2011, Comedy
Plot: The Muppets have to get back together to save their studio from an evil businessman.

Thoughts: The best part about this movie is that it never stopped being about the Muppets. Segel was great at balancing the comedy, music, and feel-good moments that have made the Muppets such a wonderful and memorable show. The music was very well done and the characters were just as I remembered them. If you love the Muppets, you HAVE to watch this movie.

It’s like your childhood is coming back.

4.2/5

Inception

Inception, 2010, Sci-Fi
Plot: A team attempts to insert a thought into the mind of the heir to one of the world’s most successful companies.

Thoughts: I’ve seen this movie much earlier than this posting indicates…I just guess it wasn’t in this year lol. This was truly a visual movie and Nolan really pushed the boundaries in terms of shot choices, story, and visual effects. The cast was alright, but with this cinematography, good acting isn’t necessary. This movie wasn’t as mind-blowing as everyone lead me to believe. Overall, a movie that may launch us into the next level of filmmaking.

Sick wide-angle shot.

4.1/5

MST3K: Warrior of the Lost World

MST3K: Warrior of the Lost World, 1993, Comedy
Plot: A lone motorcyclist in a post-apocalyptic world seeks to rescue a woman who has been captured by the rulers of the land.

Thoughts: This movie had it all, a wise-cracking motorcycle, bad guys in futuristic suits, a battle royale scene. I don’t know how they didn’t get nominated for an award of some sort (sarcasm of course). The movie was hilarious in and of itself and the MST3K crew made it all the better. Watch it for a good belly laugh.


MEGAWEAPON

4.6/5

Mystery Team

Mystery Team, 2009, Comedy
Plot: A trio of high school seniors who have been fighting crime as a detective agency for over 10 years are now facing a real life situation in which they have sworn to solve the case.

Thoughts: This movie was not as harmless as I thought it would be. It featured pretty much anyone that you would see turning on NBC on a Thursday night (including a cameo by John Ralpheo). Donald Glover did an excellent job as the lead and the cast’s chemistry was solid. Some of the jokes were a bit cheesy but it’s a decent movie to watch on a lazy afternoon.


Masters of Disguise

2.7/5

Scream 4

Scream 4, 2011, Horror
Plot: The scream guy just can’t leave his old victims alone.

Someone, get me out of this movie!

Thoughts: Sorry excuse for a horror movie (though it’s not really my genre) I was very disappointed and couldn’t even finish the flick. I’m tired of the same premise, though I can appreciate the stability of a series in a world such as ours.

1.5/5

Out for a Kill

Out for a Kill, 2003, Action
Plot: Seagal battles the Chinese Mafia after they set him up and kill his wife.

Thoughts: In this movie Seagal is an archaeologist…I’ll let that settle in for a minute. The most he said about any thing he found was “that is one shiny rock”. It’s ridiculous how he can get away with this, but I guess if Tyler Perry can…I’ll quit before I offend.


The only guy who can pull of a leather jacket in 90+ degree weather

The one thing that irked me was the fact that every scene with the Chinese Mafia were the EXACT same, except as they died one-by-one, their chair was left empty. The movie was a typical Seagal movie, laughable and very entertaining. I watched the movies, so I guess he’s doing something right.

1.7/5

Limitless

Limitless, 2011, Drama
Plot: A struggling writer takes a pill that enhances his overall attributes but is detrimental to his health.

Thoughts: I’ll be honest…I watched this because the Office told me to. It was not nearly as entertaining as Darrell led me to believe. The coloration was overkill (akin to Natalie Portman actually transforming into a Swan) but it wasn’t too unbearable. At times I couldn’t tell if the drug made you Superman or just high and the story was pointless. The characters had no motivation and little drive because of that fault.


Mom! I spilled by alphabet soup again!

Decent movie, but I’m disappointed in my trusted friends at the Office (Creed, why’d you let me down?!?!)

2.2/5

MST3K: The Final Sacrifice

The Final Sacrifice, 1990, Drama
Plot: A man and a young boy must save the world from domination from a bunch of Zionist Canadians.

Thoughts: I watched the MST3K version of this movie and loved it. I can’t imagine people actually seeking out this movie, but I guess some did. The story was random, the characters were hilariously sad and the whole cult looked like guys interested in some freaky stuff. Watch this!

3.8/5

Gnomeo and Juliet

Gnomeo and Juliet, 2011, Family
Plot: The Romeo and Juliet play portrayed by garden Gnomes.

Plot: This movie was not as cheesy as the trailers indicated, in fact some of the parts of the movie were pretty funny. James McAvoy was featured in the film and held his role down well. With this movie you get a little more than you expect, but not too much more.

Still a better love story than twilight.

3.5/5

The Master of Disguise

The Master of Disguise, 2002, Comedy
Plot: A young waiter finds out that he comes from a long line of masters of disguise and he must meet his destiny in order to save his parents.

Thoughts: I remember this movie being a lot funnier when I was younger, guess some nostalgia wears off. Dana Carey was considered the best impersonator (before Frank Caliendo stepped on the scene). Some parts were sexist and racist, but it was harmless (still boring though).

“A little wiener and some tiny nuts”

1.8/5